Kingdom Hearts Mischief
by GradGirl2010
Summary: Even the Kingdom Hearts crew has to wind down after a long day. They can't be serious all the time.
1. Story 1

**Kingdom Hearts Mischief**

**What do our heroes, villains, and characters in between do on their days off? They goof off – that's what. Join Sora and his friends, Mickey and crew, the Organization and more as they drive each other up the wall with crazy antics. May include a few Disney worlds. They have to go somewhere.**

**This is a series of drabbles. Multiple stories, scenes, and funnies. Combining all characters from the KH games. **

**I OWN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Square Enix claims all except my imagination.**

**Oh and for those who are interested, Kingdom Hearts 3 is rumored to be released in 2014. I hope not. I can' wait two years. But as I said. It's just a rumor.**

**Hope you enjoy!**

**(*)(*)(*)**

**Story 1:**

_**The dangers of waking Aerith**_

_**Radiant Garden – Merlin's House**_

The door to Merlin's home bursts open. Leon and Cloud flinched while texting. "GEEZE LOUISE!" Cid rasped exhaustedly, dropping Gummi Parts off to the side. Nervous sweat drops dripped down Leon and Cloud's head. "IF I SEE ANOTHER GUMMI MUFFLER," He slammed the door, sliding his feet sluggishly, "I AM GOING TO-"

Leon and Cloud both slapped hands to the old man's mouth, holding a finger to their lips. "SHHH!" Cid cocked a confused brow. They pointed nervously to the bed. Aerith was sleeping soundly, humming as she exhaled. Cid swallowed a large lump, nodding in gratitude to the two men.

"CLOUD!" Zack burst the door open, shaking the shelves. "HOW MANY TIMES MUST I WARN YOU?" He let the door slam even harder than Cid. The three men cringed and glanced back to Aerith. She turned on her side towards the wall, grumbled tiredly. "DON'T BORROW MY SWORD," He drew his sword. The blade danced like seaweed, "IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE NEAR MERLIN!"

Cid, Cloud, and Leon all slapped a hand to his mouth. "SHHH!" They pleaded. Pointing to Aerith, the four men noticed her arm over her ear. She grumbled under her breath. Zack grabbed duct tape and triple plied his mouth. Giving a thumbs up.

Once again the door burst open, magical star and star stream erupting. The four men groaned drearily. Merlin entered with his tea set dancing around his head. The sugar cup pelted him with cubes, the tea pot with tea bags, and the cups with handle boomerangs. "THIS IS WAR, ZACKARY!" He declared. Flourishing his hands, the tea set halted, setting itself neatly onto the table. Aerith groaned even louder, turning on her side to the table. Her brow was twitching. "YOU SIR HAVE TRIFLED WITH A FORCE OF WHICH YOU NO COMPREHEN-"

Zack and Cid shoved a ball into his mouth. Leon and Cloud tied his beard around his mouth. Through muffles her shout curses, demanding to know what was the meaning of gagging him. The four men pointed trembling fingers to Aerith who covered her head with a pillow. Merlin Took out his wand and wrote _Sorry_, in the air.

For the fifth time the door burst open, shattering into multiple wooden pieces. Leon and Cloud face palmed in aggravation. Cid and Zack scrambled trembling hands in their hair. Merlin came close to crapping bricks. Sephiroth glared Cloud and Leon down. _One Winged Angel Theme plays! _ Aerith's fingers curled into the pillow. "CLOUD STRIFE! LEON SQUALL!" He howled. Aerith removed the pillow. "YOU TWO ARE OFFICALLY DEAD!" Aerith turned onto her back. Zombie-like she sat up. "I allow you to borrow my sword out of the kindness of my heart," Aerith's feet touched the ground. Sephiroth unveiled his sword, "AND YOU DO THIS TO IT!" Dents and scratches traveled up and down the blade. "WHAT'D YOU DO? ALLOW JULIUS TO USE IT AS A TOOTHPICK?"

"MMMMHHHHMMMM…" Zack, Cid, Merlin whimpered like frightened Chihuahuas, hugging each other as they backed away. Leon and Cloud felt chills of dread run down their backs. Stiffly they twisted back, heads quivering to allow their eyes to face the beast behind them. Sephiroth raised a not impressed brow. Aerith was awake. Her eyes hidden beyond a shadow and her bangs. An ominous aura emanated from every pore. Leon and Cloud coward under the table, whimpering like puppies.

Aerith approached Sephiroth wordlessly, her arms swaying side to side. "What do you want?" Sephiroth sneered. Aerith held a hand out. Leon, Cloud, Zack, Cid, and Merlin bunched together behind opposite side of the table from Aerith, wondering what she was doing. "Why do you want this?" Sephiroth handed his sword over. Aerith pinched her fingers to the blade, running them up and down studiously. "You think you can fix it?" Aerith nodded wordlessly. "How?" Sephiroth asked hopefully. Aerith pinched her fingers firmly, tightened her hand on the hilt and _SNAP! _Broke the sword at the hilt. Irked and _OH MY GOD _lightning struck Sephiroth. The five terrified men lost their jaws to the ground. "WHAT IN KINGDOM HEARTS?" Aerith dropped the blade. "YOU CRAZY, PINK LOVING, BITCH!" Aerith held the hilt like a wine bottle. "AND WHAT GOOD DO YOU THINK THAT WILL DO YOU-" Aerith swatted the hilt into his head, blood spurting on impact. Sephiroth collapsed unconscious. Aerith threw it into his head, finalizing the strike. She then turned to the five cowering men. Slowly they backed away, praying in their minds. Aerith's eyes flashed demonically. She cracked her knuckles,

_**Outside Merlin's house**_

Sora, Riku, Tifa, and Yuffie sauntered for the wizard's house happily. "So this Aerith," Riku cued in, "What's she like?"

"You'll never meet a sweeter person." Sora promised him.

"Yeah. She totally nice." Yuffie assured him.

"Choir children sing when she walks into a room." Tifa described exaggeratedly.

"_AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!_" Blood curdling, horrified screams shrieked from beyond the door.

"I think those choir kids are having an off day." Riku cringed. His attention fell onto a glue and duct tape door. "What happened to the door?"

A happy, giddy Aerith emerged from the door. She closed it and jumped when it fell. Riku, Tifa, Sora, and Yuffie gawked in bewilderment. "Oh…" Aerith blushed, holding clapped hands to her cheek, "Hello everyone." She chimed heavenly. "How are you?"

"We're fine~…Aerith." Yuffie faded into a new topic. "What was that scream?"

"Oh it was just Leon, Cloud, and the guys crying about a spider." _HUUUUH? _The four droned, imagining a spider and four grown men. "It was a big spider." The spider grew. Something still didn't seem right. Aerith pushed the four along, "Let's go get some ice cream and you can introduce me to your friend here."

_**Inside the house**_

Cloud, Leon, Zack, Cid, and Merlin were stacked on top of Sephiroth, large lumps bulging from their heads. "What's her blood type again?" Leon's eyes swirled.

"AB." Cloud moaned, prodding his lump.

"This girl has you whipped."

"You have no idea."

**NEEEEXXXXT!**


	2. Story 2

**Story 2**

_**Crime of all Crimes**_

_**TWTNW**_

A deep breath was inhaled into a snaggletooth mouth. A whistle was blown. Larxene was in a policeman's uniform. "ALIRGHT BITCHES UP AGAINST THE WALL AND SHUT THE HELL UP!" Xion, Demyx, and Roxas, jumped from the couches and plastered themselves to the large window. Larxene patted a police baton in her hand, stomping exaggeratedly loud to make the three tremble. "This is a search and seizure!" She slapped the baton. Xion flinched. "Move before I'm done," She jabbed the baton into the window. Lightning surged. Roxas and Demyx flinched, "You'll find yourselves crispier than a critter."

"Uh…" Xion raised a skittish finger, "Larxene?" She whimpered.

"THAT'S OFFICER, MADAM, LADY COP, LARXENE TO YOU!"

"Right." Xion and the two boys exchanged irked sweat drops. "Officer…lady…madam…cop person…" Whatever her title was, "Why are we being searched?"

Larxene snapped the baton to the girl, prodding her nose. "I'm glad you asked, little toy." She cooed, teeth bearing like fangs. "There is a thief in our midst." She paced. Roxas, Demyx, and Xion turned to keep the hot-tempered Nymph in view. "And this thief has stolen a precious Organization item from a most esteemed," she held a snooty palm in her chin, her eyes twinkled, "And drop dead gorgeous Organization member." Demyx rolled his eye, scoffing at her vanity. Larxene glared back, lightning flashing in her eye. Demyx ducked behind Xion. "The item in question…" She reached into her uniform and produced an empty tub, "IS MY SHEEN, CLEAR HAIR GEL!" Xion, Demyx, and Roxas death dropped in disbelief. "NOW CONFESS! Which of you is the perp of my product?"

"Why would any of us want your gel?" Xion roared.

"The stuff you use gives use dandruff!" Demyx scratched his head, imagining dandruff upon his noggin.

"Besides none of us have been near your room all week!" Roxas assured her. "What's the big deal, anyway?"

"What's the big deal?" Larxene removed the police cap. "THIS IS THE BIG DEAL!" Her hair-tennas drooped sadly. "IT'S A CRIME AGAINST ALL THINGS SACRED!" Xion, Demyx, and Roxas tilted their heads confusedly. "My antennas are supposed to be up and flowing lusciously and springing!" She wagged her head. "Not hanging like Goofy's ears."

_**At Disney castle**_

Goofy was replacing books in the king's study chamber. "AAAACHOO!" Books and their pages exploded. The goofy dog sniffled.

Donald sprouted from beneath books and their pages. A ribbon bookmark hanging over his beak. "REALLY?"

"Ah-yuck, yup." He rubbed his nose bashfully. "Someone's talking about me."

_**Back at TWTNW**_

Marluxia and Axel walked in, curious brows cocked at Larxene looking over a quivering Xion. "Lar~xene?" The two hummed cautiously.

"Yeees." She sang happily and maliciously, her hair drooping antennas changing into horns.

The two swallowed nervous lumps. They were already scared to ask. "I KNOW we'll regret this," Axel finalized as a fore comment, "But…" he whirled his hands, trying to figure how to word his question, "What are you doing?"

"One of these brats stole the rest of my hair gel and I will have reparations!" She shoved the baton into Roxas's throat, lightning building. "Or they will all fade from their nonexistence."

"Hair gel?" Marluxia chimed. "Is it sheen, clear, and came in a giant tub?" He coward back as flames ignited upon Larxene's scalp. She glared like a troll. "I guess so." He trembled. Axel hid behind him.

"HOWWW…DOOO…YOUUU…KNOWWW?" She droned demonically.

Marluxia and Axel prodded in the general direction, grinning nervously. "Luxord was applying the same gunk earlier." Axel's voice rasped. "Said something about a hair-" Larxene ported out in an explosion of lightning, "Out of place?"

Xion, Roxas, and Demyx saluted. "Fare thee well, Luxord."

Marluxia ran his fingers like a cross. "May you rest in pieces."

_**Luxord's Room**_

Luxord admired himself in the mirror, running a palm over his flat bleach blond hair. "The girl truly knows how to pick her product." His door incinerated into ashes. Larxene, a raging flame engulfing her, entered his room. Her languid antennas wafting in her rage. "Oh bullocks."

**NEXT CHAPTER!**


	3. Story 3

**Story 3:**

_**Wrong Message**_

_**Destiny Island – Tiny Palm Tree Island**_

"The universe has waited long enough Sora!" Riku scolded his gloomy friend. "You have to tell her and you have to tell her now!" Sora flinched, sinking into himself. "If you don't, someone else will!" He grabbed Sora by the shoulders, shaking him violently. "And she won't take it well from anyone else!"

"Alright, alright, I'll tell her." He acquiesced. "I might as well." A mad blush filled his cheeks. "I would've had to tell her sooner or later."

"Hey guys." Both boys grunted nervously and froze. Facing to the side, a bewildered Kairi stood before them. "Who do you have to tell sooner or later?"

Riku and Sora exchanged uncertain glances. Riku then shoved Sora into the sand and pointed an accusing finger. "Sora has something to tell you!" With that he buzzed off, leaving scorch marks as he cowered in the shack.

"Thanks Riku." Sora droned.

"Is he alright?" Kairi wondered fretfully.

Sora jumped to his feet, dusting off his butt. "Sometimes I wonder." He grumbled affrontingly.

"So what is you wanted to tell me?" Sora felt his blood run cold. "I hope everything's okay."

"No! No! Everything's fine!" He laughed weakly. "I just…uh…" He rubbed the back of his neck feverishly. "There's…something…" He licked his dry lips, "I need to…" His heart was going to burst any second, "Tell you…Kairi."

"Well get on with it." Kairi giggled excitedly. "The suspense is…" Kairi trailed off as Sora drew closer, "Killing me?" Sora eyes were firm…serious. An expression not native to his face. Gently he placed his hands to her shoulders, keeping her in place so she could not run. The heat rose to Kairi's cheek. Sora inched her closer. "Sor…uh…" Her voice broke, quivering as her body did.

"Kairi," he spoke in a low husky voice, "For many long, wonderful years I've been your friend and you mine." He recited poetically. "Not once do I take back the day you arrive during the meteor shower." He smiled warmly, "The heavens truly sent down one of their angels." Steam erupted from Kairi's ears. Her face the very image of a cherry. "Which is why…" he slid his hands down her arms, "I know…" his hands found hers, "I can say these words," He brought their hands up, hodling them close, "And you'll accept them with an open heart." Kairi's mind went blank. _Oh my god! _She shrieked in her head. _Is he?…no…but he is…isn't he? _"Kairi…" Sora trailed a finger down her cheek. Her eyes widened. _He is. _She smiled from ear to ear. His finger touched her tooth. "There's a piece of paupu fruit stuck in your teeth." Kairi's mind broke. She became a dumbstruck anime chibi after that. "Seriously," Sora shrugged his hands cynically, "It's been in your teeth all day! It's driving people mad!" Kairi curled her fingers into a vengeful fist, nails piercing into her skin. "Here's some floss." Sora slapped the small container into her hand. Kairi clench it so hard it began to crack. Sora shooed his hand, "No go take care of that, will ya?"

"Is that all you wanted to say?" Kairi's voice shook, containing the Spartacus Rage burning within her. "Is that all you wanted to tell me?"

"Yeah." Sora answered honestly. The next thing he knew a fist drilled itself into his cheek. Sora was launched into a palm tree, snapped it in half, and splashed into the shallow ocean pool below.

Kairi stomped away, floss in hand. Riku emerged from the shack, scrambled out of the heated Kairi's way. Then he saw the broken tree. "Ahh…" He hummed. Meandering to the side of the small island, a brutally battered faced Sora lied collapsed on the broken tree, floating in the water. "You were sincere, honest, genuine, softened her up with praises, and gave her compliments making her swoon." He listed off, calculating the outcome with the chain of events. "All in all," He clapped his hands, breathed in and out heavily and folded his arms with satisfaction, "I think she took that well." He nodded firmly. Riku then collapsed when a coconut nailed him in the head.

Sora returned to lying dead on the tree, prodding his cheek. "Geeze! What'd she think I was going to say?"

**Okay that's all I could come up with. This was just for fun anyway. I'll update whenever I have an idea. So for now this fic is complete. **


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